The hares let us know early on that 'vice is nice, but incest is best.' What better day then to hold the Valentine's incest hash, than the day after Valentine's Day? The three hashers with initials 'SS' hared this run, and in keeping with its theme, they all looked inbred (not from the same family, though). Too bad we couldn't have started in front of a sex shop or strip bar, but I guess Zany Brainy is ok if you need a place to start.

What had me puzzled was the connection of this location to any of the hares. Zip, as far as I knew. The only connection I could possibly make was that Wankers Aweigh lives not too far away. But Wankers was in the pack, and Hot Legs was in class (actually, she's enjoying a torrid session with Bill Clinton every Saturday morning, but nobody has the heart to tell poor Wankers). Little did I suspect that we'd end up in Slick's parking garage, but I guess some folks had to be thinking ahead, because the hares got caught about 2/3s of the way through...

Among the hares, of course, was Spread Sheets, otherwise known as the Hashit. Seems I recall reading somewhere that the Hashit is supposed to CARRY THE SACRED VESSEL DURING THE RUN!?! I mentioned this to Spread Sheets in loud manner, and her humble mumble in reply was enough to convince me that she knew she was in Violation of Hash Standards. Contrast this behavior with the Buddha, from whom we had to pry the hashit away! Oh, how I long for the olden days, when the Hashit considered it an Honor to run with the Sacred Vessel held aloft proudly on Saturdays for all to behold...Oh well. The hares took off at 10 in a puny cloud of flour-- which was just as well, because they used ample amounts on the trail.

The pack was left to chill for another 10 minutes in the fresh breeze. As dogs clamored to start, the morning shoppers recoiled aghast at the sight of us. After Poop Deck led the Father A, we took off in search of flour. We guided around nearby high rise apartments, along muddy slopes, and eventually found ourselves near the first of the Arlington Runs-- Four Mile Run, Lubber Run, you name-it Run, we-ran-it-Run.

The best feature of this trail was a loop that ran us down one side of Four Mile Run, over a bridge, and then straight back on the opposite bank back to where we picked it up originally. Another nice feature was that Slick's parking garage was about as sheltered from the wind and cold as you can get. Maybe one of our hashing spooks can arrange an On In in an underground bunker one of these days...

The trail was easy to lose once you entered the garage, but everybody found it eventually. The hares must have run out of flour at the end...Anyway, On In!
The Circle

The Hares: Stained Sheets, Slick Slit, and Spread Sheets

Anniversaries: Slick Slit (205), Eat It Raw (135), Pit Stop (125), Steamer (95), Yes Dear (55), Well Hung (15), Chris Wilk (5), and Eat Me For Breakfast (5)

Virgins: John Durgavich, Lauralea Gilpin

Returners: Mark Kimmitt, Bush Master, Puss 'n Boots

Namings: Mark Kimmitt received the moniker (Thorny Shaft)

Violations:

Late Sign In: Burnt Sox, Hairball

No Cups for the Beer: The Hares

Valentines Day: Everyone who should've gotten some the previous night, but didn't. Thankfully, not many drank for this.

The Hashit

Retained for another week by Spread Sheets, who had hidden it under her vehicle so that nobody else would try to take it away from her. Let's let her keep it until she develops a healthier respect for Hash Tradition!

The hares distributed red roses at the On In, donated by one our number (wish I could remember who). What a nice gesture! Perhaps on April Fools Day the hares can distribute mirrors!

My Work Here Is Done. Is Done.